In Denver, school officials found out the hard way the lengths to which students will go to impersonate "official" Facebook pages of the Denver Public Schools (DPS), creating unsupervised places for teens to cyberbully each other.

These "fake Facebook profiles"  are in fact, Imposter Profiles, the term for one of the six cyberbullying tactics we discuss in Cyberslammed.

An Imposter Profile is set up to deliberately confuse and mislead the public to believe it is owned by someone else (usually the target of cyberbullying).

In this case, the teens set up the Imposter Profile to resemble an official DPS page in order to cyberbully unsuspecting students. Once the real DPS got wind of it, however, they shut it down.

Has your teen been a victim of the Imposter Profile tactic? Buy our book online to determine how to Understand, Prevent, Combat & Transform this tactic.

​Source: The Denver Channel.

Here's another story this week about a 10-year-old girl from Canada who found herself targeted by a group of girls at school.

According to CBC News, the mother made a Facebook post stating "a group of girls her age (10 yrs old) created a profile under her name... and have been commenting on (friends) photos telling them to go and kill themselves."

Most parents still don't know what this is, so we'll tell you. It's called an Imposter Profile, a cyberbullying tactic, in which the perpetrator(s) create a fake social media account in the name of the person they are targeting to get everybody to believe the account is owned and maintained by the target.

The article doesn't offer much in the way of resolution to this common tactic, we have an entire chapter dedicated to how to prevent and handle it in Cyberslammed, including when to bring in the school, the police or even the law.

As far as the horrible comment of "Go kill yourself" we have seen that tactic over and over again in cyberbullying as a way for the perpetrator to emotionally destroy someone. In school presentations I've done, I've told kids time and again to mentally prepare themselves for that phrase and to come up with self-talk ahead of time to protect themselves against it.

Here's hoping that little girl will be able to find strength and resilence and that her school will have a cyberbullying policy in place (also included in our book!).

Buy Cyberslammed online or contact me for a signed softcover copy.

A San Antonio father spoke to News4sa.com about the horrendous treatment his 17-year-old son received via a fake Twitter and Instagram accounts this month. The accounts were a version of what we call an Imposter Profile (a cyberbullying tactic that sets up an anonymous account to dupe the viewer in believing it is owned by the target).

According to News4sa.com, Leo Vasquez said:
"When I saw the Twitter accounts and really the content of the attacks and how vile and malicious and disgusting they were, that's what really upset me."


The bully created fake, anonymous Twitter and Instagram accounts to try and terrorize Vasquez's son, Matt, who'd been battling lymphoma for the last two years.

Compounding Vasquez' frustration, law enforcement provided little help and they couldn't determine how to unmask the cyberbully, who would just recreate a new account after the old one was deleted.

The only way to cut through this red tape, as we outline in our award-winning book Cyberslammed, is to work with an attorney to obtain a subpeona.

As Texas happens to have a cyberbullying law that outlaws cyber-impersonation, this subpeona could be used to unmask the perpetrator electronically so that they could move forward with criminal charges.

Learn how to protect yourself and what your state laws are. You are not helpless to fight this!

Get all of the tactics in one book and prepare your child to recognize and defuse certain types of cyberbullying. Sale: $12.50 Buy The Book

It took the Federal Investigation Agency (FIA) nearly 1 1/2 months to track down and arrest a 21-year-old Pakistani college student after cyber harassing a former schoolmate through an Imposter Profile he created in her likeness.

When media is not familiar with this cyberbullying tactic, they typically call it a "fake website" or "fake Facebook account." What happened was, the young man had been friends with the victim, but when he perceived her to brush him off and show interest in another boy, he decided to "punish" her by creating an Imposter Profile. This is when the cyberbully sets up a website or profile and gets the profile's followers to believe it is genuinely owned by the target. This kind of tactic has a lot of power and the cyberbully can do immense reputation damage in a very short time.

Read the entire story here.

If someone you know is an unwitting victim of this type of cyberbullying tactic, get information fast on how to work through and resolve it with the police.  $12.50 Buy The Book

It's always a relief to hear a cyberbullying story with a positive outcome. In this Washington teen's case, she found the resilience to move on...something that doesn't always happen for teens.

According to the Issaquah Press, in 2011, "then 12-year-old Leslie Cote was the victim of cyberbullying, as two classmates hacked into her social media page and posted altered photos, including one with 'I’m a slut' superimposed on it."

For parents and educators wondering what this tactic is: it's called an Imposter Profile, when the cyberbully sets up a fake website or profile (or hacks into a real one as in this case) and gets the profile's followers to believe it is genuinely owned by the target. This kind of tactic has a lot of power and the cyberbully can do immense reputation damage in a very short time. Another subtactic the cyberbullies used was "slut-shaming"--to try and publicly make Leslie feel guilty or inferior for certain sexual behaviors (even when she didn't engage in them!)

The article further states the cyberbullies altered their attacks by using "the site’s instant messaging service to act as Leslie to proposition boys for sexual acts." Again, this is still using the Imposter Profile tactic, only now the cyberbullies were actively communicating through IM as though they were Leslie with the sole purpose to embarrass and defame her reputation. Subsequently, the girls were charged with cyberstalking and first-degree computer trespassing.

The summer after this incident, Leslie wouldn't even go outside all summer as one of her cyberbullies lived in the same building as her.

Now Leslie is in high school with some of the girls who cyberbullied her and even has to sit next to one of them in one class. But, luckily, the support of her family and her own strength and resilience has helped her gain perspective.

As the article quotes her mother Tara:  "Leslie said she’s not angry with the girls anymore, but it has taken her some time to get to that point. At first, you have anger, you’re upset and you have rage, but now I think she feels more sorry for them."

For anyone who has ever been cyberbullied, it's gratifying to know there are kids like Leslie out there who refuse to let the traumatic incident forever define them. Good for you, Leslie. Stay strong and thank you for helping other kids after what you've been through.

To read the full article: http://www.issaquahpress.com/2014/03/25/cyberbullying-victim-puts-past-behind-her/


Get all of the tactics in one book and prepare your child to recognize and defuse certain types of cyberbullying. Sale: $12.50 Buy The Book

WAH-LAH!  (Yes, we know that is not correct French.) Here is the latest cyberbullying novel from Kay Stephens, award-winning co-author of the cyberbullying guide for adults, Cyberslammed™

Ethel Is Hot LOL features twelve-year-old Ethel F. Effleby, who goes to the Seaside School for Girls, a science and leadership middle school in Maine. After moving in with her Gram, Ethel is just fine with her oddball self until a group of girls create a website called Ethel Is Hot LOL!! making fun of her and her family secrets. When the cyberbullying gets so bad that she has to face her enemy, Stephönë on national TV, Ethel confronts her greatest fear yet. To clear her name will she have to expose her humiliation to the world?

Email us if you'd like to review the new novel and receive it for free! Info@cyberslammed.com

Five Town CTC and I have collaborated on a column to address the national news in Maine (our home state) concerning the death of Glenburn teenager, Nichole Cable and information on what parents and teachers can do concerning youth online safety.

A 20-year-old acquaintance Kyle Dube was indicted with murder and kidnapping in connection with Nichole Cable. From the news reports, he got her to meet up with him by luring her to a remote wooded area under the guise of a fake Facebook account, or what is known as an  “imposter profile,” in which she believed she would be meeting the real owner of the Facebook account.

Understandably, situations like these heighten parents’ fears about their children’s safety online. Here are some suggestions on how to broach this topic with your own children.

An imposter profile is when someone creates a fake website or social networking profile in order to deceive the target.  In this case, the predator stole the identity of someone Nichole may have possibly known in real life and communicated with her through this imposter Facebook profile. The imposter profile has since been deleted and my understanding is that the FBI fully investigated it. 

I have not spoken to the family nor to the police, so I cannot speculate as to why Nichole trusted this man and chose to meet up with him.

What we do know is that predators often “groom” young boys and girls online by befriending them and finding out what they like, what hurts them and what makes them tick in a short amount of time. It’s incredibly easy to find a wealth of information on a teen simply by requesting to be a friend on Facebook. Once the teen accepts the friendship request, the predator looks at what kind of media/music/movies the teen likes, what drives his or her personality and what “angles” they can use to manipulate the impression of having common interests. For example, the predator sees what bands the teen likes on his or her Facebook page and stores that as nuggets of conversational “bread crumbs” by casually mentioning: “Oh you like One Direction? I like One Direction too!” From there, the common interests quickly lead to personal revelations and “heart-to-heart” talks. Pretty soon, the teen feels like he or she has someone special who deeply understands them and might be the only one who knows what they are going through.

What parents/teachers can do.

As upsetting as this situation is, Nichole’s story needs to be told to your teenagers as a talking point. Here is an excellent list of tips in how to guide this conversation.

Meeting People Online: Dos and Don’ts of Online Relationships for Teens

The number one rule I tell teens is “Don’t friend anyone on social media that you don’t already know in real life and trust 100%.” Everything you upload for content can be used against you, whether to “groom” you for nefarious purposes or in cyberbullying situations as content to be repurposed for malicious reasons.

So many teens shrug off this advice thinking, “Oh, she’s being alarmist. It’ll never happen to me.”

It happened to Nichole and that’s why her story needs to be told.

The other suggestion I‘ve repeatedly made to parents is to implement www.uknowkids.com app on your teen’s cell phone, Facebook, Twitter and Instagram accounts.  This free “parental intelligence system”  instantly alerts you via text or email if any keywords your teen and someone else are using contain language around cyberbullying, sexting and predatory grooming. You’ll also know whom exactly your teen has accepted as a friend on social media without compromising his/her online privacy.

Get all of the tactics in one book and prepare your child to recognize and defuse certain types of cyberbullying. Summer Sale: $12.50 Buy The Book

In Cyberslammed, Hot Topics, we discuss cyberbullying tactics that come from real-life news stories and insights on how to "identify, prevent, combat and transform them."

Minnesota-Recently a group of female high school football fans from one team got into it with fans from a rival team and is so often the case, they took their fight online.

A story in Fox9.com reports:

"Officials say at least one of the bullies made a post on Facebook urging a group of girls to go kill themselves...

Investigators say the suicide posts came from a fake Facebook account, and they're still trying to track down exactly who is behind it. "

[Note: If you've followed this blog, you'll know that a "Fake Facebook account" is what we call an Imposter Profile--a website or social networking profile set up by the perpetrator to appear as if it is owned or maintained by the target.]

The story goes on to say:

"Parents should be aware that what they send is often electronically traceable," Hattstrom warned. "If it's offensive or threatening in any nature, basically, you're going to hear from the Police Department."

Kids know that the "Go kill yourself" hot button is the ultimate insult/torment these days, particularly with the rash of international and national suicides that have been linked to cyberbullying this fall. I had a kid ask me yesterday, "How do you know if you're being cyberbullied?" as in when is it a prank and when does it get real?

According to Cyberbulling Research Center, the true definition  of cyberbullying (which we use in the book) is: "willful and repeated harm inflicted through the use of computers, cell phones, and other electronic devices."

A one-time prank where someone steals your password to your social networking profile and writes some mildly teasing or obnoxious words, while unpleasant, is not really cyberbullying. It's misconduct or peer harassment. But true cyberbullying is a calculated campaign. Keep in mind the words "willful and repeated harm."

Any time some one is threatening you, telling you to go kill yourself, using extremely derogatory language, publishing your private information, defaming you, libeling you....any time words and intent cross the line into criminal behavior, that's when you know it is real. And that's when it is advisable to bring the police into the situation.

Case in point: this story of a Veazie, ME target of criminal threats brought the police in. And in no time, they found out who the perpetrator was. Kids need to understand that just because you know how to write an anonymous comment via an anonymous account, you are never anonymous. Everyone leaves a digital footprint behind with every keystroke and the police, cyber crimes units and the FBI know exactly how to find the source of every electronic communication.

The rest of the article states:

"Police say they recognize there is a fine line between free speech and harmful threats, but they say charges are possible in this case. If students are behind the anonymous bullying, they will also face punishment from the Anoka-Hennepin School District."

Free speech does not lend itself to threats of any kind. In both the Minnesota and the Maine case, girls crossed the line, venting their frustration, their fears and their anger into something much more malevolent and lasting. And prosecutable. Unfortunately, most cyberbullying cases do not get the attention they need until they are at the highest threshold and become policeable. We need to have in-class or at-home training with our kids about cyberbullying before it's even at its lowest threshold to help them channel potential negative emotions into better outcomes.  Stay posted to this blog for more real-life examples of the most common cyberbullying tactics and what Cyberslammed and other Maine resources are doing to provide school trainings.

Get all of the tactics in one book and prepare your child to recognize and defuse certain types of cyberbullying. Summer Sale: $12.50 Buy The Book

The Supreme Court is about to rule on a Facebook Imposter Profile case of a Canadian teen.  "The case pits the media's right to report on court proceedings against the inherent vulnerability of young girls subject to online sexualized bullying and the risk of harm if they're required to reveal their identity and republish comments, according to court documents."
Full story below:

story originally from: The Montreal Gazette

Supreme Court to rule on Facebook cyberbullying case  
By Natalie Stechyson September 26, 2012


OTTAWA - A teenage girl who says she was a victim of cyberbullying will find out Thursday whether she'll be able to keep her name and what was written about her on a fake Facebook profile out of the public eye.

The Supreme Court of Canada will announce in a judgment Thursday whether the Nova Scotia girl known only as A.B. can keep her name and the alleged defamatory statements said about her online under a publication ban, while she tries to sue the person or persons responsible for defamation.

It's the first time the Supreme Court has taken on the topic of cyberbullying, and a number of interveners - including a national media coalition, the privacy commissioner of Canada and Kids Help Phone - have chimed in on both sides of the case, which was heard in May.

The case pits the media's right to report on court proceedings against the inherent vulnerability of young girls subject to online sexualized bullying and the risk of harm if they're required to reveal their identity and republish comments, according to court documents.

What's at stake is the open court principle, which is what lets the public understand and scrutinize what's happening in the courts, said Marko Vesely, a Vancouver lawyer who represented the British Columbia Civil Liberties Association, who also acted as interveners in the case.

"Like the old saying goes, 'sunlight is the best disinfectant'. Having the courts open to scrutiny is what gives us all confidence in the court system," Vesely said.

Anytime a court declares something defamatory, it's a restriction on freedom of speech, Vesely said. And it's concerning if that's being done without being open to the public, he added.

But a child's safety should come before any discussion of openness, said Rob Frenette, the co-executive director of BullyingCanada.

Putting A.B.'s name and the details of what was written about her out into the public will likely just further victimize her, he said. And, if she does have to reveal these things, it could scare other cyberbullying victims from getting help, Frenette said.

"As students come forward to us about being bullied we need to ensure their identity is protected, simply because they feel that if they come forward...they could become more susceptible to bullying," Frenette said.

In 2010 A.B. found that someone had made a fake Facebook profile using her image and a slightly modified version of her name, according to court documents filed last year. The profile allegedly included "scandalous sexual commentary of a private and intimate nature," the documents say.

In pursuing a defamation case, A.B. has requested that the identity of the person behind the IP address linked to the profile be released by telecommunications company Bragg Communications - a request that has not been opposed.

But she also sought an order to allow her to proceed with a pseudonym and a partial publication ban. This order has been denied by the lower courts.

A.B.'s counsel has argued that the previous courts failed to take into account the special vulnerability of children, according to court documents.

According to UNICEF Canada, who also acted as interveners, some of the risks to victims of cyberbullying can include physical and emotional health problems, depression, eating disorders, nightmares, and acts of self-harm, including suicide.

Get all of the tactics in one book and prepare your child to recognize and defuse certain types of cyberbullying.  Sale: $12.50 Buy The Book

Texas 8th grader Brianna Sosa, 13 decided to go to her local news channel and tell her story after a summer of vicious cyberbullying.
According to Valleycentral.com, "The teen said it’s been going on the entire summer and it all started over a boy.

Sosa claims several girls have been attacking her and even creating fake accounts on Facebook under her name.

'They are just saying a whole bunch of stuff about me, mean ugly mean stuff,” Sosa said. “And that same girl made a fake profile of herself telling everyone it's me.'"

The term is: Imposter Profile. It's one of several tactics that her cyberbullies used to denigrate her and break her down. They also participated in a Digital Pile On when they began bombing her Facebook page with mean and nasty comments.
"Brianna's mother tells Action 4 News she forced her daughter to delete her Facebook account when she found out about the alleged cyber bullying, and began documenting all the postings and alleged fake profiles."

The mother did the right thing, first by shutting down anything on Brianna that could be used against her and by starting a paper trail of evidence to show police or even attorneys, if necessary.

There is so much more one can do to prevent and combat these tactics before they happen to YOUR kid. Cyberslammed will show in depth how to do this, in a logical step-by-step fashion.

Get all of the tactics in one book and prepare your child to recognize and defuse certain types of cyberbullying.  Sale: $12.50 Buy The Book

School hadn't even started for this Arizona boy when an imposter website set up in the boy's name threatened to ruin his reputation. According to The Sahuarita Sun,  "The trouble started late Saturday night when the child checked his Facebook page and discovered the phony page. The still-unknown creator of the page had replaced the boy’s last name with a sexual euphemism and portrayed him as homosexual.

The page also said that the boy was planning to start a fight at school the following Monday. In addition, photos taken from the Facebook page of his mother were used on the fake page, including a photo of the boy as a baby being held by his grandfather."

To read the full story go here.

Two points worth noting here, no three--

1. Defuse The Words The most common insults that are used to cyberbully both straight and homosexual kids are the words "gay" or "fag"--and for girls, they are commonly "whore or slut." Come up with what we call “pre-play” strategies with your teens for potential conflicts or ones that are already occurring. Pre-play the use of this word in a potential cyberbullying situation and devise a number of ways they can choose to react to it.  Bullies know these words hold power and hurt when wielded publicly. Teach teens to strip the power right out of these words. Now, how do you do that in a realistic situation? (Not some "the More You Know" type of public service announcement advice that make teens roll their eyes right out of their heads.)  Besides the classic advice of "ignoring it," I just looked to see if there were any verbal techniques to handling this--all I could find is a yahoo thread giving advice. Some of this advice just antagonizes the aggressor, some of it is just dumb, but I saw one or two lines in there that seemed realistic enough to demonstrate to the cyberbully that the teen isn't all that bothered by their use of the word (i.e. disabling the power.) Modifying one piece of advice in here, I especially liked the mature approach:

"Say 'Dude I'm not gonna play your game. Just because you say that I am doesn't mean i am. Sorry to disappoint you."

2. Ditch The Conflict "The page also said that the boy was planning to start a fight at school the following Monday."

The article doesn't give enough detail about this, but suffice it to say, the boy was fully in conflict with someone or a number of people offline before the incident happened. As we keep saying, the problem is the behavior, not the technology. No matter what age your teen or tween is, your teen is always going to encounter conflict with a classmate, a friend, a romantic partner, at some point.  And whatever conflict that starts offline has the potential to go online and vice versa. Our Imposter Website chapter provides specific conflict resolution exercises to help teens avoid the behaviors that get them enmeshed in this tactic.

3. Protect your online privacy "In addition, photos taken from the Facebook page of his mother were used on the fake page, including a photo of the boy as a baby being held by his grandfather."

Parents--we can't say this enough-you contribute to your own children's cyberbullying when you inadvertently allow the public to view photos/video or any other sensitive information about your child. If the cyberbullies can't find something on your kid, they'll look to see who else they can "lift" content from. So be vigilant about keeping your social media profile protected from public view.  Teach your kids to keep their online content (called their digital footprint) private and neutral. With their online comments, postings, video, photos, etc.— it’s all traceable—and highly usable to a potential cyberbully. Get them in the habit of self-monitoring everything they transmit through Facebook, Twitter, texting, etc. and see if any of their content can be used against them or can start or add conflict to something else.

Have a safe start to the school year.

Get all of the tactics in one book and prepare your child to recognize and defuse certain types of cyberbullying. Sale: $12.50 Buy The Book